Reproduced in full and unedited - not summarised, not tightened, not rewritten in a house voice.
I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist based in Hawaii with 16 years of professional experience in the field. Throughout my career, I have provided therapeutic and consultative services to individuals across a wide age spectrum, including young children (3 through 13 years old), adolescents (14 to 19 years old), and adults (20 years and older). My journey in the helping profession began in 1995, during which I have held both private (non-profit) and public-sector roles.
“The Conversation” in Sessions
I strongly advocate for the significance of "the conversation" in therapy and counseling, aiming to demystify the counseling experience while acknowledging each client's unique perspectives. My objective is to foster a non-judgmental, authentic virtual environment in which clients feel secure sharing their life narratives, including the circumstances that led to our initial engagement. In Hawaiian culture, this approach is often described as "talking story." Clients are regarded as the foremost authorities on their own life experiences, possessing inherent strengths to address their current challenges, whether or not they recognize them. My role, as I perceive it, is to facilitate this process and provide necessary support.
My "Systemic Perspective”
My specific licensure as a Marriage and Family Therapist might suggest a focus on working solely with married couples and families; however, most of my expertise is in providing counseling and therapy to individuals. I approach each case by carefully analyzing the individual's circumstances and the factors that led them to seek help. This is done from a systemic perspective, using a strength-based, solution-focused, and cognitive-behavioral approach. This "systemic" perspective includes the individual's interactions and relationships across different areas of their life, such as work, family, social activities, and personal experiences. It also considers how these relationships may influence their current attitudes, habits, and behaviors. While the systemic perspective might seem broad at first, it serves as a basic framework-an "initial template"-that allows individuals to share their personal experiences during our sessions.
The Approach and Process in Sessions
In my counseling/therapy sessions, I strive to establish a dynamic process characterized by sharing, exploration, and learning. I employ a strength-based, Cognitive-Behavioral, Solution-Focused, and pragmatic approach that emphasizes identifying overarching themes and specific details about the client’s current circumstances that have led them to seek counseling or therapy. This initial phase involves the client narrating their experiences related to their presenting concerns while also expressing their ideal and realistic outcomes.
The primary objective of this process is to formulate pertinent goals and a clear direction for subsequent sessions by pinpointing "exceptions," or instances in the client's life where their presenting concerns either did or did not manifest. Clients are often required to recall particular details surrounding these occurrences, such as the individuals involved, the setting, the time of day, and the relevant time period in their lives-whether past, present, or future. This recollection process may pose challenges and evoke emotional responses.
In instances where a specific memory becomes particularly distressing, the client may choose to take a break, discontinue the discussion entirely, or redirect the conversation to a different subject. It is imperative that the client retains agency and determines when they are prepared to engage with a specific situation.
Assignments and Resources
The BetterHelp platform offers a variety of resources, including worksheets, access to an online journal, and, in certain instances, informational videos. Recognizing that individuals lead busy lives and that their time is valuable, I am careful in my assignment of worksheets, whether they are intended for completion or review. For clients who feel comfortable, I encourage the use of the journal function as a beneficial tool for self-exploration.
Embarking on the journey towards a more fulfilling and joyful life requires courage, commitment, and a readiness to confront the unfamiliar. My colleagues and I, as therapists on this platform, are dedicated to providing support throughout this process.
Joachin Kaaihue, on the BetterHelp listing · read 6 Nov 2026